In Conclusion

Two A handful of people have asked me in the past why I named my blog “Burned, Broken, But Still Awesome”. 
With the year drawing to a close, now seems like a good time to answer. 
I haven’t exactly lived an easy life:

Taking a transatlantic flight in a box layered with pillows and blankets at 3 days [...]

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Twas a Link Before Christmas, And All Through The Blogs…

Hot sportsmen wore nothing, not even a sock…
The showers were running all backwards in dares…
In the hopes that some shoppers would soon think like bears…
…
That’s as far as I got without my non-poetry-wired brain crashed.
Happy Holidays, everyone!

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7 Weird Demigod Widgets

Over at Decoybetty and Yellaphant, there’s a 7 things meme and although I wasn’t tagged, I figure it’s good fodder for more strangeness in the Demiworld. Although why I bother is beyond me, considering there’s an entire category of dementia that describes my life.
In the spirit of the holidays, I figured I’d turn into a [...]

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A Photo-finish Holiday

Some lovely holiday wishes I found on the internetz:

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Weird Demigod Widgets – Episode 121

I may be a narcoleptic.
I have this uncanny ability to fall asleep no matter where I am, what position I’m in, and what I’m doing. I work this mortal body pretty hard, and it has to keep up, what with my soul being so old and all, it just wants to get the best out [...]

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Just Another Day in The DemiWorld

When a typical guy gets a knot the size of his back, he goes to his favorite barber to get a cut, a shave, and a massage using one of those machines that look like a vibrating anvil.
I guess. I wouldn’t know. Very few people would call me typical, and far fewer would call me [...]

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Five Questions

Two years ago Avitable found a 5-question meme and last week I joined in on the fun.
I know, I know, there’s a connection there somewhere but right now my eyes are still caked with sleep crust after a 14-hour “nap”. It was an exhausting week and a cosmic fight with The Teddybear (we’re fine, thanks [...]

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Like a Good Metaphor… Only It Was Part 2

Thanks Fleasha for sending me these in an email!
26. Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.
27. She caught your eye like one of those pointy hook latches that used to dangle from screen doors and would fly up whenever you banged the door open again.
28. Her date was [...]

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It Was Like A Good Metaphor, Only It Wasn’t

I found these in my old archives and laughed like Amy Winehouse being told to go to rehab.
Wait…
The 25 Funniest Analogies (Collected by High School English Teachers)

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a ThighMaster.
2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking [...]

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What English Critters Want for Christmas

Holysweetjeebus on a stick these are AWESOME AMINALS.

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Day Without a Gay

Tomorrow is apparently Day Without a Gay.

We’re supposed to “call in gay” and fight hate with love by volunteering for community service. 
First of all, while I agree that the economy as we know it would come to a standstill (not to mention the collapse of the fashion world) if homosexuals everywhere were to stop working. [...]

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Five Things.

Boris. Try and imagine it without the infamous last name. Boris. SOOOO frickin funny. I’m totally fixating. BORIS. Oh, and totally check out Deidre’s game. It’s much fun.
One of my training proteges is blogging! HAYLAVETTE!
Vodkamom is irreverently reverentially funny. HAYLAVETTE!
This comeback is totally cocked, armed, and ready for deployment from my arsenal: Some-Random-Bitch: “WTF are [...]

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Camera Whore, Thy Name is The Demigod

Just found this. I know, I know, I’m ridiculously behind the times (and incredibly narcissistic, but I don’t really care. ). Don’t you just love www.photofunia.com? 

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You Googled What NOW?

“I love cock” I can make my peace with. I mean, who doesn’t, really. But “Dora the EXPLODER”? Methinks this is a training video of some sort for young terrorists? 
And please, don’t google instructions on how to fuck your wife. You know I find the heterosexual lifestyle choice unsettling.

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Movie Review: Twilight

 
I finally gave in to the incessant badgering of my friends to watch “Twilight”, apparently the movie du jour of the moment. This is the movie that middle-aged pasty geeks the world over have lined up for to watch. 
*shrugs*
I came in with already drastically low expectations, as I am wont to do in books-turned-to-movies. Add [...]

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Petit Papa Noel

The Teddybear and I swung by the local Krispy Kremes here in Manila and found Santy Claws. Holy jeebus on a stick how do you eat something this cute!

As we were eating our doughnuts, a song from George Michael came on (which I totally confuse for Boy George all the time. The former got arrested [...]

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The Crackberry Weekend

I lost my little Obama about a week ago and I thought I’d go nuts. This is my little Obama: 

This was a “Blackjack” device from Samsung. Boy do those pesky Koreans know how to rip off or what? I mean seriously, “Blackjack”? Couldn’t think of anything to trump “Blackberry”?
So this week I thought I’d make [...]

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Sign Me Up!

Do I get to pick the delivery method?
WAHAHAHA!
Will post something more mature soon.
Like, maybe in the next 10 years.

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Fabulous

Gourd Blue Bonnet Chris over at Csqaured+3 apparently thinks I’m fabulous and gave me this lovely little gem, I heart you C!
Now, I’m a big fan of dogs, and obviously I’m a big fan of stilletos. I’m not too sure what that squiggly line is trailing her…
It could be:
1. Toilet paper stuck to her heel
2. [...]

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